I’m making an effort not to appear submissive. Our daily routine remains much the same. I still make her breakfast and dinner, and I still do most of the household duties.
The weekend argument is forgotten and we are happy once more. The difference is that I don’t place any expectations on her. If she chooses to “reward” me in some small way, that’s entirely her initiative.
This is the way I should have allowed things to progress from the start.
If there’s any advice I can give others who wish to embark on a Female Led lifestyle, it’s this:
Just do things for your wife. Don’t expect anything in return.
Don’t raise the topic of Femdom. Show her the benefits of this lifestyle by example. Serve her more each day but don’t place any pressure on her.
I think V is subconsciously starting to accept our new roles. She’s beginning to see me as her servant and she seems comfortable with that – at the moment.
If I ever detect any hesitation on her part, I back off. I’ll engage her in a conversation about politics, current affairs, her career, her future goals – whatever. But the important thing is to maintain her interest in me as an intelligent individual – not as a slavish puppy dog.
So it seems she is taking to me serving her. She enjoys that aspect of our relationship. But she also wants me to think for myself, stand up for myself and appear as her equal in all other things.
In time, I’m sure, the dynamics of our new roles will sink into her psyche and she’ll genuinely see me as her inferior. She’ll embrace her newfound authority over me and this lifestyle will become perfectly normal. But I have to let HER grow into this role without my encouragement; on her terms, in her own good time.
In the meanwhile, I just try to make her life as comfortable as possible.
This morning, before leaving for work, I changed the bed linen and put on a crisp, white bedcover, white sheets and pillowcases. I then went down to the local shopping strip and bought six long-stemmed red roses. I put these on the pillows as a surprise when she arrives home from work tonight.
Secretly I’m still reading Elise Sutton’s book “Female Domination”. But I don’t do so openly, and I don’t leave the book around where V can see it. I don’t want to remind V of terms like Femdom. I don’t want to associate our new lifestyle with any expectations on her part.
Take it slowly. That’s the hardest thing for me, but it’s the only thing I can do.
Besides, over the past week or so I HAVE been topping from the bottom, I HAVE been pressuring her, making demands on her. I’ve been extremely selfish. I’ve been manipulative to achieve my own personal desires and, indirectly, I’ve been the one who has dominated our relationship.
This is simply not acceptable. Nor is it workable. No wonder we’ve got off to such a bad start.
It’s little wonder V has been confused and exasperated. On the one hand she’s expected to be in charge, to give me orders. On the other hand there’s this expectation on her to behave in a certain way, to provide certain gratifications.
I should expect no reward. I should not EXPECT at all!
It seems I’m finally learning.